Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Clearing my head.

 I have way to many thought to keep up with in my head, I am going to thought purge. Okay here it goes.

 I feel like I can't do anything right as a Mom.... I miss my Idaho friends... I miss my Idaho family the Lynns.... I hurt one of my Idaho friends feelings because of my lack of tact and I wish so much that she could understand how sorry I am so that we could be friends again because I really enjoyed our friendship.... I have really good Florida friends.... I love the beach and collecting sea shells and wish that I could go every day by myself  for a few hours.... I had a crappy birthday and I am still annoyed about it... My tiny apt is a blessing and a curse, blessing because we have a place to live in, curse because it is so tiny and and it gets dirty so easy and I am waiting for our apt management to decide that we have one to many people in our apt long enough and try to make us move to a 3 bedroom that we can't afford..... I am is a self criticizing funk that I am having a hard time getting out of, and I am starting to get depressed because of it...... I hate folding laundry and will leave it in the laundry baskets until Tony breaks down and does it..... Sorry Tony......My Mom is my pep talk super hero, she helps me to think of ways to feel much better about myself when I am in one of my self loathing funks..... My friend Rianna is awesome.... I am really sad that I don't live it Idaho because I want to throw a baby shower for my friend Lara J. after years and years of trying they finally got blessed with a beautiful pregnancy and I am afraid that her new friends don't appreciate her situation enough to throw a awesome baby shower for her.....  Jason and Lara I am beyond excited for you guys.... This kids is going to know movies better than any other kid on the block and will probably win a movie trivia competition when he is like 3 hahaha!... I'm not going to name names on this one, but I want to beat the tar out of one of my friends older brothers because he is being a ridiculous jerk face to her..... I have the Best family and In-laws.... I think my Sister in-law C.H. is amazing she has been through a lot in her life and is still positive and I am very happy for her and her new happy family life.....I love going to the Temple...... My husband is such an amazing man and I am so grateful that he chose me, he is such a blessing to me.... I love my kids so much and and feel so blessed that they chose me to be their mom, I wish I could remember that better when I am having my mom struggles..... I haven't vacuumed my car in over 6 months and it bugs me, I don't want to pay to use a vacuum at the car wash because I can't vacuum my own car out at my apt because I don't have a 5000 foot extension cord....  Amanda, I miss you.....They don't have PaPa Murphy's in Florida..... that bugs me...... My scripture study skills ins majorly lacking, and I am having a hard time getting back into the swing of it.... I think my cousin Camille is an amazing person....  Colleen Johnson I am still so so so so grateful to you for all of your help to find us a place to live here in Florida..... Manatee's are adorable....I am looking forward to seeing Sea Turtles...... I am addicted to food, and have very little self control when it comes to eating..... I hate that about myself..... I think that i may continue to thought purge on my blog, because now I feel much better.......maybe..... I don't know...... you may learn more about me that you may not want to know.....

2 comments:

  1. I LOVE YOU!!!! I love your thought purging! I miss you like crazy! You are a great Mom! A better Mom than me! I cry when I really miss you! I can't control myself with food either! I Love you my beautiful sister!

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    Replies
    1. I love you! and miss you so much too.

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